Sunday, 23 October 2011

That Man City guy

Carlos Tevez decided not to play for Manchester City in the Champions League but was he really that bad. There was about 10 minutes left and to be honest it was really cold I agree with Tevez by the time he had warmed up it would be the end of the match.

Oh wait a minute he was homesick. Oh I see so if he was to play against Bayern Munich he would have broken down in tears . In fact Tevez isn't actually a human he is an alien designed to gain as much money as he can for his alien friends so they can take over the world with the dalek (Lescott) and the dinosaur (balotelli) they might take shrek (Rooney).
The names we know them for are actually code names rooney roo= big and ney= nose. Balotelli balo=never telli = smiles. Lescott les=massive cott= forehead.

Never mind though the alien tevez will probably end up at plymouth where he won't get paid at all. And the manchester derby is actually a massive dr who re-union. If the score finishes 2-1 to Manchester United it's a code for let's take over the world.

Tevez- tev=overpaid ez=idiot

Saturday, 15 October 2011

Why I love Alan Rolland

Alan Rolland. What a legend you have denied wales a place in the rugby world cup final. I wanted wales to win but changed my mind due to all my friends deciding to becoming 1/2 welsh.

All world cup we had all this about Wales being better behaved than england etc. But the point is we didn't get a player sent off. That's why Alan Rolland is cool.

He shutup all those useless people that pretend to be welsh when they do well.

We all know you are French and we all know it was probably a yellow card but good for you Alan Good for you

Sunday, 9 October 2011

Useless Data for a stupid planet-IBM

Throughout the whole of this world cup in rugby some of the worst adverts have been produced by IBM. One of them, two ladies who in their trollies stop and say "they had 49 mnutes and 32 seconds in the opponents half". I mean wouldn't you be starting to get seriously worried if your grandma said that. The stuff they say isn't even interesting. A guy flicks a bit of paper over a coffee mug and says "That's a kick conversion rate of 87%". OK no one cares how good your co-ordination between your thumb and eye are the fact that you have got an 87% conversion rate shows you have done it lots of times. There are stupid people saying it like a takeaway man who asks if a guy still wants his pizza after knowing how many kicks Johnny Wilkinson has missed or something like that. Of course he does and why would you phone up a takeaway company just for the live commentary of what is happening in the match. And there's a sushi one do the Japanese even play rugby...oh yeah. IBM you are idiots the adverts are bad

Wednesday, 5 October 2011


The world wide web was invented by Tim Burners lee in 1991. He is on the right. He graduated from Oxford University. He's also a proffesor  of Electronics and Science Dpartment at Southampton University. He was knighted by the queen in 2007. The World Wide Web he created has revolutionized computers for ever. Without it we may not be able to play games or even use social networking sites. Berners-Lee currently lives in Lexington, Massachusetts (USA), is married to Nancy Carlson, and has two children, Alice and Ben.
here is a timeline of this mans life 

  • 1976 A Physics graduate of The Queen's College, Oxford University, UK. Principal engineer with Plessey Telecommunications in Poole, Dorset, UK.
  • 1980 First hypertext system called "Enquire"
  • 1981–1984 Director of Image Computer Systems
  • 1984 Started at CERN, Geneva, Switzerland.
  • 1989 Writes his proposal for a global hypertext system.
  • 1990 Writes the World Wide Web server, and client software for NeXTStep.
  • 1995 Received a "Kilby Young Innovator" award by the The Kilby Awards Foundation and was a co-recipient of the ACM Software Systems Award.
  • 1996, July Was awarded a Distinguished Fellowship of the British Computer Society
    Currently The Director of the W3C and also at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology the 3Com Founders Professor in the School of Engineering and at the Computer Science and Artificial Intelligence Laboratory (MIT CSAIL).
  • A director of The Web Science Research Initiative (WSRI),[5] and a member of the advisory board of the MIT Center for Collective Intelligence